The Dysregulated Truth
You've said it in your head a thousand times.
You've never said it out loud.
This is where you say it. No names. No judgment. No "but I love my kids" disclaimer needed. Submit something you actually feel — the raw, unfiltered truth of being a mother, a wife, a woman. Selected submissions are shared anonymously each week because the thing you're most afraid to say is probably the thing someone else desperately needs to hear.
I miss being my own person instead of just the one who remembers everything.
I don’t want to be asked what’s for dinner ever again in my life.
I swear sometimes I just want to disappear into a hotel room alone with my phone on silent.
JOIN THE VILLAGE
Ask a Mother. Hear a Therapist. Trust a Village.
HEAR FROM YOUR VILLAGE...
Guilt!!! Even when I do my best, I still feel like I should have done more.
Ashley
The loneliness. I’m around people all day and still somehow feel alone in it.
Tiffanee
Being needed every second. I love my family, but sometimes I just want one moment where no one needs anything from me.
Steph
THE REGULATED PERSPECTIVE
Thoughts from a Therapist:
When answering this - Nobody said "the dishes." Nobody said "the laundry." What you're carrying isn't the work... it's what the work costs when no one sees it happening. The mental load, the guilt, the loneliness, the resentment. These aren't separate problems. They're the same thing showing up in different clothes. They're what happens when you spend all day regulating everyone around you (your kids' emotions, the mood in the room, the invisible logistics of a whole family) and nobody, including you, registers that as labor.
The resentment isn't the problem. It's the signal. It shows up when a need has been unmet long enough to harden into something louder. And the guilt at bedtime isn't your conscience, it's your nervous system still running after everyone else has clocked out. You are not failing to cope. You are coping with too much, in too much silence, for too long!
Tips and Tools:
The Nightly Offload
Before bed, grab a piece of paper (not your phone) and spend five minutes writing down everything your brain is still holding. Not a to-do list. Not a journal. Just a dump. Everything you tracked, worried about, didn't finish, felt bad about, or are dreading tomorrow. Then fold it up and put it somewhere physical. You're not solving anything. You're just telling your nervous system it doesn't have to hold it overnight. That it's been seen. That it can set it down.